Good morning friends. A reminder that tonight I will be hosting a little get-together for anyone desiring more connection, to discuss belonging and whatever else may come up. As I mentioned in my previous blog, I think there are a good number of people that feel like islands and fool ourselves with the illusion of false connection through social media. I’d like to sit with some people, flesh and blood, awkward, smiling, nervous, happy, sad, brave, broken-hearted, human and just be real. I don’t know what it’ll look like, but as I mentioned in my last post I am hoping for a cross between an AA Meeting and a Poetry Reading. Ha!
Personally, I have been through a lot of hard shit in the last few years. I have gone through rejection and isolation among other awful things. In it all, I began to seriously question things I’ve believed my whole life – about myself, about religions, institutions, about humanity in general and how we treat the lost and the broken-hearted. Things shifted and changed drastically in my DNA. Through all the shit and questions, I made a choice to not be beat, to not be swallowed by the waves of darkness. Actually, it’s a choice I make everyday. To push through and somehow, somewhere find a silver lining or something that resembles hope or light, love, connection and belonging; anything but despair, isolation and depression. I realize no one else can do this for me. Yeah, I see a therapist, but it isn’t her job to change my unhealthy thought patterns or behaviors. It’s equally two things: my own hard work and my willingness to learn something new or see things differently – and then apply those things to my life. It’s not about other people changing and then my life finally coming together. Nope. It’s about accepting things as they are and adjusting my expectations and interpretations. My own healing and happiness are no one else’s responsibility but mine.
I don’t think I am ready to share my stories publicly yet, and don’t feel like you’d be asked to do the same. I get when discussing vulnerability, people need to feel safe and we fear that sharing our stories may end up isolating us even more. That’s not what I want to happen. But what I do hope will happen is people opening and engaging in conversations that might help each other connect. “Pain is our Mother, she makes us recognize each other” -an Over the Rhine lyric which I quote a often mirrors what I’m talking about.
So, if you’d like to participate in person, shoot me an email at email@example.com, I’m hoping to get started tonight around 8:30 pm. If you’re not in town or aren’t able to break away tonight but would like to Skype in from home, you can! If you don’t already have Skype, you can download it here. http://www.skype.com/en/ It’s free and you can set-up an account super easy. To find my profile, type in my user name: jessie.mariewimmer. I will post it to Facebook as well. If you plan to Skype in, please let me know so I can have it all set-up for you to participate in the conversation.
Before we meet, it should go without saying that this is a judgement-free zone. If you’re a judgy crumudgen, please don’t attend. If you have a bend towards gossiping, don’t come. If you have an agenda to try to push on people, don’t come. If you strongly believe in something – that’s great, but I am not looking to make this gathering a place to push anything on anyone unless it’s a message that affirms: You are loved – just as you are right now. You are worthy of Love and Belonging. You are deserving of Connection. You have Purpose. It is possible to get well and find peace and happiness. The hard things that have happened to you, or even that you have brought upon yourself are not some message from the universe that you’re a piece of shit and you deserve crap. No. The only message I hope we can all communicate is that life can be hard, yes….but you are beautiful and brave and we can rise strong. Please do not come if you want to get people saved, or get people to come to your church, or get people to sign up for your pyramid scheme, please don’t.
As human beings we all long to hear the above affirmations. We desire to be loved and accepted just as we are. I’m not a doctor, or a theologian, or a philosopher, or a therapist, but I want to see and learn about and fight for more connection between humans. To find the mechanisms of communication and connection that tear down the walls that separate us, not build more.
Tonight 8:30. If you wanna bring snacks & drinks, feel free. Let me know if you’re joining.